Question by Alexis: How do you know when you’re addicted?
My boyfriend says hes addicted to cigarettes. He says hes tried to quit, but he can’t. I think it is a bunch of bullsh*t. I know that if I really wanted to stop something I could in a heartbeat. So, my question is, how do you know when you become addicted and I just don’t understand why you can’t just stop smoking?

Best answer:

Answer by tigertiger_ca
if you can’t stop….you’re addicted. Period.

Answer by tink_mcd
If you’ve never been genuinely addicted to something, it’s probably hard to imagine what it’s like. I can see how you might imagine that it’s not even possible.

Still, there’s pretty solid evidence, as far as I know, that certain substances are addictive–and certainly the nicotine in cigarettes is considered to be highly addictive.

When someone is addicted to something, they experience physical “withdrawal” symptoms when they don’t take in enough of that substance.

However, many, many addicts have successfully quit using the substance they were addicted to, whether it was alcohol, nicotine, or some other drug. “I’m an addict” isn’t an excuse not to quit–it’s a reason to seek help and support in quitting. Some get that help from medical caregivers (doctors, psychiatrists) and prescribed medications such as a nicotine patch, Wellbutrin (an anti-depressant that has a good reputation for helping people quit smoking as well), or Antabuse (which makes people throw up when they ingest alcohol). Others find support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous helpful. For really serious and persistent addictions that are having profoundly negative effects on a person’s life, some people find that they need to go through a residential rehabilitation (“rehab”) program.

If your boyfriend truly *wants* to quit, encourage him to explore the different kinds of help available. Be aware, though, that even people who are highly motivated to quit smoking (because, for example, they’ve been diagnosed with emphysema or lung cancer) can still have a very hard time doing so. Some of the ex-smokers I know tried several times before finally managing to quit. And some people who have successfully stopped using an addictive substance never stop craving it: they have to be constantly vigiliant about their behaviour, lest they “fall off the wagon.” That’s why many refer to themselves for the rest of their lives as “a recovering addict” rather than “a former addict.”

Hope this helps you understand and support your boyfriend in any efforts he makes to quit. Even if he doesn’t quit, for your own health you can make a firm rule that he must not smoke in your presence or in any enclosed space (e.g., a home or car) that you share. If he won’t respect that, then I’d question whether he really cares about you. Just as another person’s right to swing his fist ends where my nose begins, I believe that another person’s right to smoke ends where my lungs begin.